That is my new mantra.  I say it all the time.  It works.  The first time I said it out loud I cried. Having lived with daily, chronic pain for three years there are times when I didn’t want to continue if this was the way the rest of my life would be. Hopelessness and depression make ones life very narrow and insular and I was so tired of hearing “you are a complicated case” from so many doctors.  A few months ago I decided to get my battle gear on and start all over again.  I’ve found two wonderful doctors – one at the Boston Pain Center and the other at New England Baptist – who want to get to the bottom of this complicated body and resolve my pain.  Saying “I Deserve To Live A Happy Life” aloud, joyously, I feel it run through my body.  My hopelessness fades and it is replaced with an expectation of joy.



  1. sam said,

    March 14, 2013 at 4:46 pm

    Beautiful, Amy!!! I applaud your indomitable spirit & seek to follow in your footsteps. Love you!!

    • lapetinaa said,

      March 14, 2013 at 8:47 pm

      I’m trying to follow in YOUR footsteps, Sam!!

      • sam said,

        March 15, 2013 at 2:23 am

        Well I guess we’ll be chasing each other around in circles then……could be fun 🙂

  2. Pat said,

    March 14, 2013 at 6:37 pm

    Good for you. Living with chronic pain is really difficult and finding a doctor that is dedicated to finding treatments for relieving that pain is a wonderful first step. With your new attitude, you will be in a wonderful frame of mind to work with the doctors. I look forward to following your journey. I’m with you.

    • lapetinaa said,

      March 14, 2013 at 8:46 pm

      I know you can relate to this, Pat. Attitude makes a big difference and so does finding a doctor who is willing to do some digging to find the answers.

  3. March 14, 2013 at 7:05 pm

    It’s about time ! Beautifully said my friend. Love you

    • lapetinaa said,

      March 14, 2013 at 8:45 pm

      Thank you for sticking by me through all the ups and downs. Xxxxxx

  4. findingmyinnercourage said,

    April 3, 2013 at 11:05 pm

    Any news from finally finding the right doctors? For a period of a year I was going from doctor to doctor to doctor and each one was telling me something different. Finally I ditched them all and focused on pain management and my primary care physician. You have to get to the place where you are comfortable with your doctors and you must stay very active in your medical care. Is my blog helping you at all? I have enjoyed roaming around your Blog – it has helped me in my chronic pain journey. I am here for you.

    • lapetinaa said,

      April 3, 2013 at 11:13 pm

      I am doing the same thing as you… Pain management. I am feeling so much better emotionally. When you have a better attitude you feel better everywhere. I admire you so much and love reading your blog. Thank you for sharing your story. Knowing that I am not alone is a very good feeling. I am here for you as we’ll.

      • findingmyinnercourage said,

        April 3, 2013 at 11:29 pm

        Our chronic pain journeys are so lonely. I admire you too. The best advice I can give you is to stay very involved in your pain management. Before having prescriptions filled go home and look at the side effects. Some of the side effects are worse than the pain. ‘i refused to take anything that would caused weight gain. Pretty much left me without taking anything because they all cause weight gain. The other side effects to look out for are the changes they make in you mentally. Always here for you.

  5. lapetinaa said,

    April 4, 2013 at 12:02 am

    I’m taking something that helps me emotionally and physically with no weight gain. I, too, am very concerned about weight gain as its taken me 24 years to get to my desired weight. I won’t sacrifice all the effort. I have a good stretch routine which I sometimes have to drag myself to do but it almost always helps. I am doing better. I take one day at a time. Sending you my very best positive vibes and big virtual hugs. Xxxxx

  6. findingmyinnercourage said,

    April 21, 2013 at 3:46 am

    Hello My friend ~

    I have nominated you for the SUNSHINE AWARD for so many reasons! Your blog is awesome!

    To accept the award follow the rules at: http://findingmyinnercourage.wordpress.com/2013/04/20/sunshine-award/

    Peace, Love & Happiness!

  7. Amy Lapetina said,

    April 21, 2013 at 12:43 pm

    I can’t believe this; it is such an honor! Thank you from the bottom of my heart. We “get” each other and that means a lot to me. xxxxxx

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